Hallelujah...the yardsale is O-V-A!

Which means now I have to tackle packing. *sigh*

Moving is stirring up so many emotions in me, its making me not able to sleep. I am SO excited...for so many reasons. My best friend and the man I love and I get to start on an adventure together- having only each other to rely on along the way. We will get to explore new things together, look for apartments/houses, figure out things together from where to buy our groceries to where to attend church. Our friendships with others will be tested- and I will pour my heart into those relationships which I wish to keep and simply back off from the ones I dont. I get to look for a new job-in whatever I feel led to do, we get to start over...together.

However, although we are not worried about our true friendships with others lasting, it will be sad nonetheless to leave those convenient ties behind. So often I take for granted that I can call almost all of my friends, and be to their house in 30 minutes or less if I want to. It will be very sad not being able to be included in things like birthday parties, group get-togethers and maybe even some wedding activities. I firmly trust in the bonds I have with most of my friends, and am ready for the extra work it is going to take to sustain those relationships from a distance. It is still sad though...to leave behind everything familiar and be on our own in a new place which might be scary at first.

There's also the slight guilt I feel for leaving the church and the teens....we poured our hearts into them....maybe even a little too much so...to the point where we didn't have time for ourselves and to nurse our new bond as husband and wife. This is both a reason why it is good we are leaving, and a reason why it is sad to leave them. We are so close to our teens, and we really love them and care about them. Luckily, they have already hired a new youth pastor, so we are relieved about that. We hope they will be in good hands! And we also hope nobody in the church thinks we're selfish for leaving, because sometimes I feel like we are.

I know all these feelings are okay, and most of them even healthy, but it makes me feel like such a girl. You know, an emotional train wreck. At this point I am just so ready to move on to our next stage of life, and I am so excited to strengthen bonds with both my husband and my friends through this experience.

I can't think of a closing zinger so thats going to have to do.

Yardsale Craziness

I am sooo ready for our yardsale to be over. We spent ALL day today pricing and organizing things....we have really built up a lot of crap over the years, which is really sad considering how young we both are. Definitely a lesson in materialism...

Anyways, I am sooo ready for it to be over!

The beginning or the end?

I'm starting to get scared. Its beginning to feel real finally....and I don't know if I'm ready! Are we doing the right thing? Are we going to be miserable when we get down there and realize that we left everything we know? There are so many unknowns ahead....pretty much everything! If nothing else, God is really teaching me a big lesson in patience and trust in Him. It is just so scary to not have any idea where we're going to live or work in a couple months. It is so unlike me to pick up and move somewhere without any sort of plans, or even knowing if I'll get into school. But I have never felt stronger that it is God's will for us...he is pulling us out of our comfort zones and showing us how to have ultimate faith in Him. And thats what is most important!

A bunch of firsts..

A couple of weeks ago, I coordinated my first wedding (of a non-friend). It was absolutely great. I couldn't help thinking, as I drove to the reception site in my black dress and sunglasses, ready to take charge, that I was born to do this! There were a few normal hitches, but overall, everything went really really well. I got along great with all the vendors (which is huge!) and the bride and groom profusely thanked me at the end of the night and even gave me a 50% tip! Haha. It was really great. I hope in Nashville I can continue doing this! I am doing Amy Lemieux's wedding on Saturday in Vermont too, so I'm excited about that since I leave for VT tomorrow!!

I've been shadowing a midwife this past week, which has also been amazing. Is it possible to feel like you were born to do 2 complely different occupations? At the same time? Haha. It has been awesome...she has totally solidified in my mind my definition of midwives, and validated my reasons for wanting to become one. On Monday, I saw my first live birth! It was amazing!! Incredible. I can't wait to start school. I feel like its so far away, but I know how fast a year can go.

Jay and I have been packing here and there, mostly preparing for our yard sale. (June 30th, if you want to come!!) It is kind of sad, as packing reminds me of unpacking when we were brand new newlyweds, into our first home. It will be sad to leave the first place we lived together, but it has to happen sometime. I just hope we don't have to live with my dad too long...

It is driving me NUTS not to be able to PLAN anything. I am sooo anally detail and future oriented that I am driving myself nuts. I keep trying to look up apartments, jobs, etc. but then my dad or Jay reminds me that I can't do either of those things until we get down there. Its still too early to find a job, and we want to make sure we live near our jobs, so its too early to find an apartment/condo (we havent decided yet what we can afford...) too. Its so annoying, but I'm trying to let go and let God.

I just took Trot to the vet for what I thought was ringworm...it was a bugbite. Haha. I am renouncing medicine as my life purpose.

Moving?

It definitely hasn't hit me yet...that next month Jay and I will be moving 1111 miles away...to a completely different culture, jobless, homeless and almost friendless. (Thank goodness for James!) I'm not gonna lie...I am VERY excited to have this rare chance to start over in some ways...particularly with jobs, and mostly for Jay. He has worked at his current job for 5 years, and who knows how long he would work there if it didnt get bought out. He stays there because its a good job and he feels comfortable there...but he absolutely HATES it. Every day that he comes home, he is defeated, both physically and mentally. His weekends used to be his only sanctuary-his chance to get out and hang out with friends and unwind, sometimes even travel...but since he's been working with the youth group, he hasn't even had weekends anymore. Its been really tough to see him go through that every day for the time I've known him...and I'm ecstatic that he now has a chance to find something he has a passion for and work there. I just hope he doesn't land himself another boring desk job!

As excited as I am to have a chance to experience new and exciting things with my amazing husband, I will be incredibly sad to leave. Most of my friends are here, and there's no replacing that. Sure, I'll be able to talk to them a good amount, but it won't be the same. I guess this stage happens eventually...people start to diffuse out and end up in different places, but its strange that its actually happening, and I'm one of the first to go.

I am just sooo excited that no matter what happens, my very best friend and husband will always be at my side to go through everything with me. After I'm done with school, who knows where we'll end up? Any suggestions?

You Are a Good Friend Because You're Loyal

You stick with your friends no matter what, even if you feel like they're doing the wrong thing. You believe in letting people figure out their own path in life. It's not your place to interfere. And part of your loyalty means that you'll do a lot for your friends. You definitely go the extra mile. You'll even do great things for friends without them asking. After all, that's what friendship is all about. You are truly a friend for life. And you have friends you've known since you were a kid. Your friends can count on you to do a favor, remember a birthday, or just be there to listen. Your friends need you most when: They can't turn to anyone else You really can't be friends with: Fickle people who change friends quickly Your friendship quote: "Friendship doubles your joys, and divides your sorrows."

What Makes You a Good Friend?

You Are 63% Pure

You're pretty pure, and you have no plans on changing that. You do have a devilish side though... and it will probably get the better of you.

The 100 Question Purity Test

Your Power Bird is a Vulture

You are always changing your life and the lives of those around you. You aren't afraid to move on from what holds you back. Energetic and powerful, you have a nearly unlimited capacity for success. You know how to "go with the flow" and take advantage of what is given to you.

What's Your Power Bird?

You Would Be a Pet Dog

You're friendly, loyal, and an all around good sport. People love to be near you. You are very open with your feelings, and you're quite vocal in expressing them. You are sincere and kind. You love many people - without any sort of agenda. Why you would make a great pet: You're content to chill out with your friends Why you would make a bad pet: You always find yourself getting into trouble What you would love about being a dog: Running around and playing What you would hate about being a dog: Being left home alone while everyone else is out having fun

What Kind of Pet Would You Be?